Single Dad Laughing
I can hear you sighing to yourself and saying UGH, she's asking us to look at another blog again?? I actually haven't spotlighted any new blogs in quite a while. And if you loathe blog surfing that's totally fine. But what I want you to know is I am sharing this particualr blog for a reason, a very great reason. I was told about this blog from my cousin Shay. She told me about it to share with me this major giveaway, but I want you to check it out for another reason completely. I admire people who tk the time to share with others what they believe in, who are not afraid to stand up to the world and say, "what you're doing is wrong." To show some integrity, people who wear their heart on their sleeve. This is the kind of person who writes this blog.
A single Dad, who says what others are afraid too, in particular what aome MEN are too macho to say. I read this post this morning that I believe is well worth anyones time reading. He titles it, "Worthless Women and the Men who make them."
Let me just share an excerpt from this post and if you see what I see then click the link to read the rest of these powerful words.
"Women aren't good enough. Women will never be good enough.
Women are, simply put, worthless.
Yes, they are all these things. If, that is, I am to believe the very words that are constantly being spoken by women themselves (which I don't). These are their words. And I've heard them declared again. And again. And again. To me, to other men, to other women, and for all I know to their pets and their plants.
Worthless. What a concept. To hold no value. To be less desirable than a can of dirt. Are you freaking kidding me? Every single statement on this list, including the worthless comment, was a declaration that at least one woman has made to me, for whatever reason. I bet there isn't a statement above that we all haven't heard at least once; most likely hundreds or thousands of times. Why would any of these horrible, degrading beliefs spill across the lips of any woman?
I am upset, but I'm not really angry at you. Just frustrated. Just sad. I understand the reason you constantly let slip these damaging statements. I understand the reason why you actually believe these things. I understand the real reason you feel this way. And the real reason breaks my heart.
Because of that, my message today is not directed at you. It is written to the men of this world.
Guys... It is our fault. The blame lies with us.
(I believe the fault lies with what he touches on, us women, and the worlds misconstrued views.)
And, frankly, I think a man is the one who needs to point a finger and begin a conversation that could actually fix this problem.
I pray to God that every person who reads this forwards it to every man that they know, and that even a sliver of those men take a moment to read what I am about to say, because it's time that the men of this world make a change. It's time we make a bold declaration against everything we've ever been taught. It's time we go against the grain for the sake of our precious and incredible counterparts.
I ask you seriously, men. Do we not realize what we have done to the women of this world? Do we not recognize the atrocities we have committed?
We have destroyed the very beauty that women are.
We've replaced that beauty with a standard that is, and always will be, impossible for them to hit. We've decided what the perfect legs are. We've decided what the perfect body is. We've decided what the perfect breasts are to be shaped like. We've decided what the perfect face, skin, butt, and neck should be. And we've made no hesitations to boldly let it be known.
We declare it, and we do so with little care for the tender women standing beside us.
And, of course, with each declaration, women hate themselves more. With each declaration, women get further and further from beautiful. With each declaration, more and more of our women willingly place themselves beneath the scalpels of so-called "doctors" who cut apart and reshape their already gorgeous bodies into something different.
Why?
Because. They can't be all of it. Not naturally. No woman can be all of it. No woman can possibly have the perfect everything and be the perfect everything. It is impossible, of that I have never been more certain.
Now, you may be naively sitting there thinking, I don't declare that. I tell women they are amazing. That they are beautiful. That there is nothing wrong with them.
Do you not understand? It doesn't take opening your mouth to propound these things. It doesn't take flapping your lips to make a statement. It doesn't take verbal anything to spread this vicious ideology.
All it takes is you and me, stopping and looking.
I've come to realize something profound that I don't know if I've ever heard anybody actually say.
It is not the impossibly air brushed females on magazine covers who are causing women to hold themselves against a standard of perfection. No, it's not that at all. Holy crap. Why am I just realizing this? Why doesn't anybody seem to realize this?
It is the men that stop and look at those magazines.
And that simple, repeated act is how we constantly, and never-endingly declare to women that they are not good enough, and will never be good enough.
We stop, and we look.
And women notice.
Women notice every time another woman walks by with "perfect" legs, and the men around her are unable to break themselves of the trance until she is gone.
They notice when we laugh or make snide comments about their gender being anything less than kind or sweet. They hear our many jokes attacking their intelligence.
And they remember it. They store it. They program their own minds to say, "that is perfect, and I must be that or people won't want me"."
He goes on to say:
"Can we not enjoy the comfort that only comes from hugging a "real" woman with "real" curves and "real" softness?
Are we so vain that we aren't overwhelmed with desire for women who feature the polished finesse of lives beautifully lived?
Can we not express our excitement over the things that day in, and day out, they so selflessly accomplish? Can we not keep from questioning whether a woman could have done more? Can we not see that oftentimes, women do much more than you or I could ever, or would even want to do? I can't speak for you, but as I ponder on the women in my life, a truly lazy or lacking woman has been rare indeed. Men, on the other hand... we have some things to work on.
You know what else we need that would help everybody? Something that would help both genders in all of this?
I can't believe I am going to say what I am about to say. I can't believe I actually do want what I am about to ask. But I do. Desperately. So, I'm going to throw it out there. I think we need women to wear clothing that shows a little less instead of a little more. We need women to wear pants that are a little looser instead of a little tighter. We need women to put their boobs back inside of their shirts. I feel crazy even saying it (I'm a single guy for crying out loud), but maybe if women gave everybody a little less to compare, this whole thing would be a little easier for us all, no matter what our chromosomal make-up.
Don't get me wrong. None of this is to say that men should or can stop appreciating beauty. That would be unnatural. That would be impossible. It is not to say that women shouldn't make themselves as attractive as they can be. It is not to say that we shouldn't appreciate cleanliness and comeliness. No, it is not to say any of those things. It is only to plead with each of you. Let's bring this world back to reality. Let's make sure that the people we are attracted to are "real" people. Let's make sure that the women we stop and look at are "real" women."
If you find this refreshing like I did you can read on at:
http://www.danoah.com/2010/10/worthless-women-and-men-who-make-them.html
There's another post about perfection that I found awesome as well:
http://www.danoah.com/2010/09/disease-called-perfection.html
Perspective.#
